Story 257
A male MD told me that what I was complaining about at Citi is the same at every other large bank. He questioned whether I’d ever worked at one before — implying I was naive or uninformed about how the world works. At my age and level of experience, I am neither naive nor uninformed anymore.
I want to name what that comment does, because it does two things simultaneously, and neither is accidental.
First, it removes his and Citi’s responsibility to act. If it’s universal, why fix it?
Second, it gaslights me for raising the concern. I wasn’t describing a problem — I was revealing my own deficient career trajectory.
But here’s what struck me most: if a male MD says “it’s the same everywhere” with that kind of confidence, he learned it. Which means he knows. And knowing, he’s chosen to explain it to me rather than do anything about it himself.
And even if he’s right — even if it is the same at other banks — that doesn’t make it legal or ethical. It doesn’t make it inevitable.
It makes it a widespread industry failure, which is a stronger argument for regulatory intervention — not an excuse for institutional inaction. “It’s normal” is exactly how systemic misconduct sustains itself.
I have worked at another large bank. I was never subject to anything approaching Citi’s level of insanity.
One more thing, because I’ve read the lawsuits and the coverage: the public record of what happens to women at Citi skews almost entirely to senior women in Markets and Wealth Management.
I work in the middle and back office. It is no better here. It has just been less visible so far. References to the Indian Mafia on this site are a strong signal.